It’s Monday morning…and things are definitely different for the families that lost children during the murderous rampage at Sandy Hook Elementary School. Things are different for all of us.
It probably looks the same on the outside for most of the country, including my family: my nieces are at school. My nephews are at daycare. Millions of parents dropped their kids off at school today, probably gave them a tighter squeeze than usual, and then drove off to work. But, it’s not the same…deep down, I’m scared. I’m scared of raising a child in a world where murders happen at elementary schools. I’m scared of raising a child in a society that is quick to blame and slow to take responsibility.
“The world is going to hell in a handbasket.” said every grandparent anywhere.
Each generation for the history of forever has been afraid for their children. We all want them to have a better life than we did. But with these tragedies and the sensationalist media, how can we be confident that our kids are safe?
I think I have an answer (it’s definitely not the answer): it’s us. (Here is where my friend, Dave, would step in and tell me I’m being an unrealistic Pollyanna.) As parents, and aunts, and uncles, and grandparents, and friends, and role models, we can make a positive difference. We can teach our kids to be the “helpers.” We can teach them kindness and respect. We can teach them how to think critically in a world where the media sells terror and ignorance. We can teach them to lead with logic instead of by impulse. We will put our foot down and discipline them when they act out. We will steer them in the right direction when they take a wrong turn. We will get to know their friends and their friends’ families. We will provide a safe location for them to grow and learn. We will love them.
(Disclaimer: of course, I am aware that dealing with a child with mental illness is an entirely different ballgame and one that I know nothing about.)
We can balance the tragedies with positivity. As a country, we need to make sure that those tiny children are remembered; not Adam Lanza. (Case in point: do you know the names of any of the kids who were killed?) We can focus on the positive aspects of those kids’ lives; not on how bad a person the shooter was. We can try to think of solutions to make our kids safer; and not focus on what went wrong.
If we can collectively make positive changes in our daily lives and try to find the silver lining in these tragedies, maybe there is a remote possibility that our generation, or our kids’ generation, could be the one to say
“The world is a better place.”
But until then, all I can say is rest in peace sweet kids…we will not forget you.
11 thoughts on “Monday Morning…”
I’m so glad someone else believes in positive thoughts, instead of dwelling on the negatives promoted by the media. I don’t have kids of my own, but I have several nieces and nephews who I have tried to instill respect, graditude, and family values.
Just reading your posts, I know that Jax is in wonderful hands. He has a brilliant, thoughtful, loving mom who will try with all that she is to keep him safe.
Best Wishes, and Merry Christmas to you and yours!
Cheryl (Menne) Amsden
Wow – thank you for the kind words – I really appreciate this! It’s been so long since we’ve seen each other; I miss the family reunions. Hope you are doing well!
ahem, not this DAVE!
Ha Ha! I was not referring to you, my friend! I was talking about another friend named Dave… But I found out today that he actually didn’t think I was being Pollyanna with this post. I was so happy to know that! See, positivity is catching! 🙂
Once again Andrea, you thought it, you felt it and then you wrote it! Good job! And Jaxson is the littlest hippie I know! 🙂
Sometimes, I’m not sure if I should post things! Thanks for the encouragement!
Andrea, yes I absolutely agree that we must combat all of this negativity with positivity. One of my favorite blogs had a post on Saturday that I loved. Read and take from it what you will.. Sending love and hugs your way. 🙂 ***************** It might be hard, but try to keep yourself out of the media fray with this. I know it feels insensitive, but it is not. You aren’t doing anything for any of the families or the world by following details; you’re just making yourself resonate in a way that channels pain, angst, and fear.
Remember that we are all vibrational—we vibrate on the frequencies of what we expose ourselves to. And then that vibration goes out into the shared world. Right now, there is a LOT of pain, angst, and most especially fear being spun out into the Universe, and into our collective consciousness (because we are ALL, every thing, more intimately connected than we may realize). The best thing you can do for the collective consciousness, our world’s heart, and our minds/souls is to resonate love, and your peace. So light a white candle for those who are hurting, including yourself… pray/meditate, acknowledging your fear and pain but then *releasing* it, and try to put yourself in a place firmly of being a prism of powerful GOOD and PEACE.
Especially when you’re in the midst of chaos, and when we’re surrounded by an echo chamber of folks who love to dive into pain and splash around in it until everyone in reach is all soaked (like FB, like the media), it’s not easy to distance yourself. I am careful where I click and watch, and I try to visualize, because it’s the easiest way for me to immediately change my own inner channel: I visualize the world around me as murky and discolored (to allow myself to acknowledge whatever it is that is wrong without indulging myself in visualizing specifics), and then myself in that world, still and glowing. And then I try to focus my visualization until I can see my own light intensify with whatever color message I want to put into it: in this case, peace, steadiness, love. And the glow spreads from my person to my surroundings until I’m slowly able to color and focus the area around me, more and more, until it’s powerfully lit, calm and clear. By banishing that murkiness in your visualization, and lighting yourself from inside, you are manifesting that.
ANY visualization that is taking you away from what the media is feeding you and putting you on a frequency of YOUR choosing will be helpful, to you and everyone else. YOU get to choose your vibration—you do not have to be held captive and add yourself to the victim toll, which is what mentally happens when you resonate with the all-too-abundant negativity surrounding chaos like this. Be thankful for your blessings, be prayerful of a good world, and then go create it. The more of us who can resonate like this, the more we are doing our part to help.
And, of course, it protects your family, who are immediately affected by your wavelength (and MOST especially our unborn children who are affected in a *most* intimate way).
It can be hard sometimes, but try to be at peace.
Wow – exactly! What is the blog address? This writing really resonated with me; I’d like to read more! Thanks for sharing. And happy birthday, by the way! 🙂
Thank you Andrea….your words are very calming.
I’m so glad this essay helped calm you. I wasn’t sure if I would spark some controversy! Thanks for reading…