Two days after Jax came home, we got our first visit from our Home Health Nurse, Jenny. I knew we were going to be visited by a nurse often during Jax’s first few weeks and months. I was so grateful! I remember being so scared – here I was a first time mom, with a negative-one-month old baby, who has just spent 3 months in the NICU, and for the first time since his early birth – I was completely responsible!
Oh. My. God!
What if he stopped breathing? What if the oxygen stopped working (which it did one night!)? What if I didn’t hold him in a correct side-lying position during his feeding and he aspirated? What if I didn’t remember to give him his medicine? What if I didn’t hear him when he woke up during the night? What if he was too hot? Or too cold? What if he got sick? Ahhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!
And then Jenny walked in. And she saw me and said: “You are a great mom!” She smiled. She taught me to trust my instincts; she convinced me that my instincts were good. She reminded me that I already knew the signs of respiratory distress – after all, I had three months experience with watching Jax learn to breath. She helped me realize that I knew what to do. She helped me believe that was a good parent.
She came twice a week for the first month. Then, once a week. Then, every couple of weeks. Until, we didn’t see her for an entire month. He weighs 18 lbs and is 26.5 inches long. Our boy is thriving! I knew it was coming…it was time for Jax to graduate from Home Care!
What I didn’t realize is how sad I would be to see Jenny go! She had become my friend. Someone who I looked forward to seeing each week. And, often, she was the only person (besides Steve and Jax) that I talked to during the day. We had a connection that went beyond care giver / patient. She noticed the altar we have for Jax’s Guardian Angels: my mom, Steve’s Dad, our our dog Lucy. She shared her own stories of Guardian Angels. As a “graduation” gift, she brought Jax a piece of amethyst quartz – which symbolizes power, protection, and healing. She definitely knew Jax! What she didn’t realize was that I carried a piece of amethyst quartz in my pocket every day when I went to the hospital to see Jax.
There is no doubt that she was another of Jax’s Guardian Angels! She will always have a special place in Jax’s story. We are so thankful to have known her!