Yesterday was Jax’s last day of preschool for the year. I can’t believe how fast it went. It’s been incredible watching him grow and learn.
He’s counting to 20 mostly on his own, can sing most of the alphabet, and is starting to learn his colors.
One of the children in his class has a sign language interpreter, so he’s learned a lot of sign language, too.
Unfortunately, he’s struggling a lot with behavior and impulsivity. There have been multiple times when he has run away from his teachers and gotten into unsafe situations. This happens at home, too, so we weren’t surprised. But we were hoping that he was just testing Steve and I and that he would make safer choices at school.
No such luck.
His teachers think it’s mostly sensory avoidance and sensory seeking that is spurring the impulsive reactions. He has issues with almost every sensory system (visual, auditory, touch, and vestibular) so it’s a lot for him to manage. He seeks out extra sensory input for his vestibular system (movement) and avoids imput for the other systems.
His sensory issues and his ADHD are a perfect storm for running away and unsafe behavior!
Last week, we had Jax’s IEP meeting. An IEP is an Individualized Education Plan and it is the document that Jaxson’s teachers and therapists reference while planning for Jax’s time in school.
I was punched in the gut during that meeting.
His teachers are recommending that Jax do only special education preschool next year. (This year, he did half special ed and half mainstream.)
They used words like: defiant, oppositional, spectrum, and anxiety when referring to Jax’s reaction to his environment. Jax has none of these diagnosis’ at this point, but the intervention and therapies are similar for all of these issues.
I’m sure that’s why it was easy for the teachers/therapists to use these words during the meeting, but I wish that professionals would consider the impact of their words on a parent’s heart before casually tossing them around.
This change feels like we’re going backwards. I’m sad that Jax tried a mainstream class and couldn’t succeed there. The promise of “catching up by two years old” is a distant longing. In fact, the older Jax gets, the more obvious his delays are becoming.
I am so proud of him! He has come so far and has worked so hard. His happiness shines so bright and his laughter can turn any bad day around. No matter his path in school, it is my deepest hope that he holds onto that light, that happiness. But he is getting to the point that he understands he is different and that breaks my heart sometimes.
My job as his mom is to fill him so full of love and hope and kindness that he can ward off any negativity with a smile and a shrug.
I can do that.